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Have you been making assumptions without facts? Here's why that spells trouble.
Forgiveness Inspiration Kindness Life relationships Self Help Wellness

Making Assumptions Without Facts? Think Again.

Assumptions are very dangerous things, especially in our personal lives. Assumptions get people in trouble daily and when combined with misinformation,  are frankly downright disrespectful. They manifest as accusations, unkind words and often gossip.

Think I am alone in that belief? Not so much. author don Miguel Ruiz, in his well-regarded best seller puts it this way:

“If others tell us something we make assumptions, and if they don’t tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate. Even if we hear something and we don’t understand we make assumptions about what it means and then believe the assumptions. We make all sorts of assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions.”
― Miguel RuizThe Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

And this:

The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth! We invent a whole story that’s only truth for us, but we believe it. One assumption leads to another assumption; we jump to conclusions, and we take our story very personally. Then we blame others and react by sending emotional poison with our word. (Emphasis added).

That said, I recognize everyone has a bad day, a bad week and forgiveness is often in order. But perhaps the next time you are tempted to make assumptions, you might want to communicate, ask questions if appropriate, apologize and promise to do better the next time.

ps…This post in no way was inspired by family members near or far. xo

With love,

Patty Comeford Adams



Happy Easter Lovelies

Happiest of Easter to you all!

I so hope this Easter day finds you feasting with family and loved ones and your heart full of joy.

While I don’t often write about my faith, today I make an exception. For me today is not about “the outfit of the day” (“ootd”), the latest accessory or the Easter Bunny. (But he is cute, and he brings chocolate. But that’s not the bigger picture here.) It’s about my faith. I know many in this world feel that Christians are or have become hypocrites, judgmental and inflexible. And sometimes, it’s hard to disagree. But in my view those people don’t really reflect true Christianity. Christianity is quite simple: love God, love people.

Here are a few things that  I’ve experienced through my Christian faith:

  • a peace that surpasses all understanding: This peace is not absolute and ebbs and flows but I find when I come back to my faith in the Lord, it always returns. And as I mentioned in my previous post on anxiety, I’ve found Sarah Young’s devotionals to be of enormous comfort.
  • a reason for being: I also mentioned in my post on what not to say to someone who is depressed, that the holidays are an uncomfortable time. Finding a way to do for others can be both inspiring and soul soothing.
  • a faithful companion: People will let you down but without question, the Lord will not. Yes, bad things happen in this world but to attribute them to God is a convenient easy-out.
  • relationship not religion: For a long time I thought Christianity was about religion. Ha! How wrong!  But based upon the way some discuss Christianity, it’s easy to see how the confusion happens.

Easter quote

So today, I wish you all these things and so much more and a very Happy Easter.


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